Why didn't I stick with Twilight?

For some reason last night after I went to the Symphony (and watched Jersey Shore) I got in bed and instead of reading the epilogue of Eclipse, I picked up my other book...the one about Le Cordon Bleu. I was about 30 pages into the Basic Cuisine section. I had stopped reading it because it was freaking me out. It was so similar to my life and decision to go to Paris that I was worried that it would make me get really anxious. Well I started reading it again, and boy did I get freaked out.

Not only was there a chapter on beheading innocent little bunnies (don't tell Lily!), but she goes through the final exam process and it really made me nervous. I had decided that I wanted to be at the top of my class a couple of weeks ago- this woman ended up sobbing on the floor of the locker room after a Chef told her she was wasting her time coming to school there. To say I'm nervous is an understatement- it's possible to fail this program, what would I DO if I failed? I'm nervous enough just getting ready to leave let alone if my mirepoix isn't perfect.

I woke up at 4:30 this morning to deal with apartment stuff, I lost yet ANOTHER apartment. Fortunately, one of the original selections has become available again so I am going to sign the contract. OF COURSE in Paris signing a contract doesn't actually mean anything, because 19 other people could have signed the contract, and of course because of the time change, it's the weekend there, so nothing will happen until next week. I"VE HAD IT with Paris housing agencies.

I've cleaned out my apt, and am about to take my car up to Napa to leave it at Dominique and Boz's house. One of the last things I have to do before I leave Sunday morning!

Je suis tres fatigue, a bientot!